Aham Brahmasmi

Every time I watch Goopy Gyne Bagha Byne , or listen to the timeless compositions that form its soundtrack, I cannot help but wonder how the 3 wishes granted to Goopy & Bagha by the King of Ghosts are so perfect, so paradisiac. "যা চাই পড়তে খাইতে পারি" (The power to bring forth any food we wish to eat, any clothes we wish to wear), "যেখান খুশি যাইতে পারি" (The power to reach any destination we wish to), "সা-নি-ধা-পা-মা-গা-রে-সা গাইতে পারি" (The power to create music) - the nonpareil ingredients of a simple, relaxed & fulfilling life. আমাদের অন্ন-বস্ত্রের সংস্থান হয়ে গেলে, যখন ইচ্ছে যে কোনো জায়গায় বেড়িয়ে আসতে পারলে, আর তার সঙ্গে একটা সাধনায় (সুরের, সাহিত্যের বা অন্য কিছু) মত্ত হয়ে থাকতে পারলে, do we really need anything else? And I think a telling factor as to to why those boons are so impeccable is the needlessness, and therefore absence, of money. The pursuit of money, especially to procure possessions and fulfil fantasies that are really nothing...

Yesterday, I completed one year of being in Calcutta. Flew down from Bombay in June last year, amidst a bit of a crisis at home. A lot has happened since then. A LOT. Maa contracted Covid and had to be hospitalised before recovering, Baba left us without giving us a chance, I took the call of relocating back here and found a new job, Baptu dada helped out immensely in moving my stuff here, Mashimoni-Mishti-Deb all contracted the virus and recovered, Shejomamu left us and we couldn't even be there, and something that had been building for years ended in an emotional cataclysm. Oh, and these are just a few. It has been a tough year, but I realise that it could have been much worse. Like it has been for countless others. As I have grown older, I've tried to cut down my regrets, to let things go, to forget and forgive. Perhaps, the one regret that I am battling with the hardest right now is that baba isn't here anymore to see me working in Calcutta. But, life goes on. Because, ...